Restaurant Etiquette 101 on 6th St.

We all know that Austin is a town where the restaurant noise level can sometimes be a bit more than people are comfortable with. I do get a few complaints occasionally on this from readers. But one has to stop and consider that we are a youngish, booming, seat-of-the-pants kind of town. Couple that with the way most restaurants are designed for acoustics and you have the potential for a higher than desired noise levels.

But I had an experience at Katz’s Deli the other night that was off the charts not just with regards to noise but also with respect to basic customer rights.

I was having a late breakfast with my about-to-graduate from St. Edward’s daughter: late as in about 1am. We were seated at the back of the restaurant and had just ordered when two youngish guys walked in and sat at the table next to us. Almost immediately, the drunker of the two started screaming (and I mean screaming) into his cell phone. The noise was bad but the content was far worse. White reaching ear-splitting decibel levels, he proceeded to tell whomever he was talking to about some recent sexual conquest he had made. His language would have made Dr. Ruth herself blush and all of this went on no fewer than 10 feet from our table.

No father likes to have to endure such boorish behavior in the company of his daughter. My first impulse was to walk over and swat the cell phone out of the moron’s hands. But instead I asked my waiter to tell the guy to tone it down. My waiter replied that that was not his job. Okay. Fair enough. So I asked for the manager. She arrived at my table and seemed annoyed that I had summoned her.

“What is it you want me to do?” she asked.

I reiterated that I wanted the guy to shut the hell up. By this point I was becoming rather agitated myself.

She rolled her eyes, walked off to the offending table, muttered something to the incoherent babbler–who never even so much as acknowledged her–and came back my way.

“I hope you’re happy” she said.

The drunken guy continued his x-rated diatribe in clear ear-shot of the manager. Nonetheless she walked away. I sat there slack-jawed.

I have unfortunately seen egregious breaches of etiquette in restaurants before-on the part of unruly customers. But never have I witnessed a scene where management chose to totally ignore such atrocious behavior. We paid our bill and got the hell out of there. I cannot imagine for a moment that proprietor Marc Katz, had he been on the property, would have handled the situation as poorly as his manager did. But he wasn’t there and the entire event left a bad taste in my mouth that no amount of the best pastrami could diminish.

The sad thing is the idiot at the adjoining table was so drunk that even were he to read this blog in the light of sobriety, he probably wouldn’t remember a thing regarding his loathsome behavior. He’ll probably pull another stunt like this the next time he gets wasted because he thinks that acting like a complete tool is part of the “keep Austin weird” zeitgeist. Perhaps on that next occasion the offended party will not show as much restraint as I did. And that would be just fine with me.